Arrangements
by K. Fang-sama
Summary: Aizen is making the Espada marry. Put through a bunch of matchmakers to find one that could bare his child, a turn of events brings Ulquiorra closer to understanding why most women in Las Noches wanted marriage.
1. Chapter 1

_**I know, stop making new ones. Can't help that.**_

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Arrangements

**Chapter One**

Ulquiorra Cifer was annoyed.

Not that this was anything unusual; he'd get annoyed with his comrades with ease, despite his abilities to refrain from showing it. Most especially around his lord. Today, however, was a different case. One that he would have rather been boiled alive than face.

Ulquiorra was walking with the other Espada, following their lord and generals. His opinion about the situation mirrored that of Nnoitra and Grimmjow, and that was sheer despise for it. He should have figured this day would come, but Ulquiorra never wanted it to. A small part of him was honestly hoping that he'd die before being brought to his current predicament, but that wasn't happening.

The Espada were going to the lower levels of Las Noches. Here were where all of the office jobs were, such as therapy, financing, as well as the Arrancar Affairs Committee. This level was primarily known for three offices, though: marriage counseling, divorce consulting, and matchmaking.

The Cuatro loathed this branch of Las Noches. It was where a lot of the women went to find prominent mates, or how his lord insisted they'd be called, husbands. It's all he'd hear about. Why someone was going to get married, or the crying about why the "relationship" wasn't working out. Yes, the ebony wanted to avoid this department at all costs, but that was out of the question.

Aizen had insisted that because of how well the group was doing as Espada, it was time that they found suitable wives (and a husband, in Harribel's case). And where Ulquiorra prided on his loyalty towards Aizen, today was the closest he ever got to joining Grimmjow and Nnoitra in refusal. He did not want a wife, especially with knowing what most of the women were like. But his lord wanted Las Noches to grow, and that had to come with the strong offspring of his Espada.

And _that_, Ulquiorra was looking forward to _even less_.

Regardless, he walked. If he was going to get "matched" with someone, he was at the very least going to make sure it was someone he could bare having near him. Aizen's only requirement in their soon-to-be-spouses were that they themselves were above the average adjuchas class. It made sense, as a weak partner was undesirable, especially for breeding purposes.

So, Ulquiorra and the others met with the "top specialists" on the matter. The ebony could care less for them, as anyone who who applied for an office job were typically of the weakest class and couldn't apply themselves any better. Either that, or they were just lazy.

There were only two that Ulquiorra took note of. The first was the head of the department: Arpeggio De Leon. He was a bit of an eccentric with tan skin and wild blond hair. He was a confident fool, but he made a suiting fit for the head of an office department. Arpeggio was naturally the strongest of them, but he was also the most persuasive. Meaning he kept his people in check.

The second was, naturally, his matchmaker: Sergi Bretz. Like Arpeggio, he was a confident fool, but he was much more annoying to deal with. A mop of brown hair over his round glasses and pale, freckled skin, Sergi had to be the worst person that Ulquiorra could have been assigned to. He asked all of these daunting questions that didn't make sense to Ulquiorra like: "What type of rack do you prefer?" and "How tall should she be?"

Ulquiorra truly didn't care. He didn't want a wife, and the way he responded made it clear he did not want to be there. The questions continued for about twenty minutes before Sergi had the mind in him to say: "I believe I have enough, Ulquiorra-sama. Thank you." And with that, Ulquiorra was led to where his lord was waiting.

He was the first to return. Only to be followed by the others ten to fifteen minutes later. Arpeggio came out as well, a confident smile on his face. He promised the Espada prominent matches by the end of the week based on what they answered. They would then be allowed to meet their choices within the week to follow, then later, map out 'future plans.'

Good. Ulquiorra couldn't help but think. At the very least this agony would end quickly. Whatever woman he got stuck with he would divorce after his first child didn't need here, he decided. Lord Aizen wouldn't care all this after the fact, and that, Ulquiorra was able to calm himself with.

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_**A bit new, but I had to get it done. ^^ See ya next time!**_

_**~ K. Fang-sama**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Round two, here we go!**_

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Arrangements

**Chapter Two**

The rest of the week was odd. Not only were the conversations that were heard about the 'future spouses' discomforting to Ulquiorra, but so was the response from the matchmaking department. Or rather, lack thereof.

Aizen expected to hear from Arpeggio before the end of the week, but when said time came, no such notice was ever given. Truly, Ulquiorra was relieved. They didn't have to meet any options soon, and he got to prolong his future suffering. That did not stop a pissed off Aizen from acting.

The Espada were walking down to the matchmaking department once more. The ten matchmakers and their boss were in Sergi's office, around the same table where Ulquiorra sat at nearly a week prior.

"This is not acceptable, Sergi, you know that!" He yelled at his subordinate, slamming a file down on the table. "You were supposed to look through all the files and find a probable match. And you come back with nothing! Nothing, you bloody idiot!" He roared, his face going red.

Clearly, this was occupying Arpeggio's attention.

One of the other matchmakers stepped forward. "Arpeggio-sama, we did get the other nine probable matches. Remember?" He said to his boss.

Arpeggion pinched the bridge of his nose, huffing in a breath of air to calm himself. "Nine out of ten are just as acceptable as none of the ten. I cannot bring this pathetic display to Lord Aizen, he will find it an excuse, and this department incompetent."

"And why would I think that?"

Arpeggio and the other ten stiffened at the sound of Aizen's voice, but the head of matchmaking soon recovered. He straightened himself, facing his lord with a slightly nervous smile. "Lord Aizen. I was going to send someone for you after our board meeting." He told the ex-shinigami.

Aizen smirked. "I'm sure you were, Arpeggio. My patience has been tried, though." Arpeggio's face paled a bit and his smile faltered. He said nothing to his lord, knowing he was not done speaking. "Now, what is this unacceptable excuse that's been delaying you?"

The ten matchmakers were stiff still, but Arpeggio only let out a sigh of defeat; grabbing file on the table before handing it to Aizen. "These are the results from Ulquiorra-sama's compatibility evaluation." He informed his lord, waiting with utter despair for his lord to look at the results.

And he did so; eyes widening briefly before turning to glare at Arpeggio. " 'Unmatchable?' " He questioned annoyed.

"That's what we were discussing." The head of the department admitted. "I am no more pleased with the results than you are, my lord. I told Sergi such a result was unacceptable and told him he had to continue checking the archives for a prominent match."

"And did he?" Came Aizen's next question.

"Twenty-nine times in the last three days, alone." Sergi informed him.

Aizen was still not pleased. "And you do not have someone more capable for my Cuatro?" Arpeggio looked he was about to say something, but stopped himself short; clamping his mouth shut as if wondering if he should dare speak at all.

Ulquiorra couldn't help but find the situation strange. He can't say he was too surprised at the idea that it was hard to find a good match for him, he didn't like most of the people in Las Noches and most feared him. But the exchange with Arpeggio and Lord Aizen was. "Arpeggio-san." Aizen demanded, tired of waiting for an answer. If there was someone better, he wanted him to step forward.

Arpeggio sighed. "Technically speaking, I have no one else under me that could do a better job."

" 'Technically speaking?' " Aizen caught on, a brow raised.

The head of the department pinched the bridge of his nose; taking in a breath before letting it out. "He's certified for matchmaking, most assuredly. However, his main contributions in these parts is as a marriage counselor as well as a divorce consultant and enforcer. I don't particularly like giving him our clientele, but when people demand better, we typically don't have a choice."

Ulquiorra inwardly cursed. He didn't want to go talking to another matchmaker. "And this person's name?" Aizen questioned, returning the file to Arpeggio.

Again, the blond sighed. "Reynaldo Fuentes," he said, taking the file back before adding: "I'll lead you to his office."

So, the group walked off. Arpeggio said that they could go over the other nine's probably matches once they reached Reynaldo's area, so everyone was going to meet him. There was a notable difference when they got to Reynaldo's area, however. The matchmaking section had a large hallway composed of three floors that had several offices behind the doors to it. However, Reynaldo's area had a large door that covered the size of the hallway, and only had one floor to it. Outside this door was an intercom system, which was used immediately upon arrival.

The head of matchmaking pressed the button, waiting patiently for the response. "Fuentes Office. State your name and business, please." The voice was male and stoic; a no-nonsense air surrounding it.

Arpeggio pressed the button before answering. "It's Arpeggio, Itzel-kun. I've got a new client for Reynaldo."

His hand moved away from the button, and not five seconds after did they hear Itzel respond: "Standby please." They waited for about three minutes or so, but the doors soon opened. Behind them stood a man with whip-lashed green hair, and charcoal eyes. He had a similar build to Nnoitra, only he was slightly shorter and wider than the latter. He had a clipboard in his hand, and an ear microphone hooked on. His eyes widened slightly at the audience, but he soon recovered. "Lord Aizen." He greeted, bowing.

Aizen smiled at this, walking in. "Indeed. Are you an assistant to Reynaldo?"

The male nodded. "Sentry and assistant divorce enforcer: Itzel Marina. An honor to meet you in person, my lord."

Said man nodded. "Thank you, Itzel-kun. Could you bring us to Reynaldo-san, please?" Itzel nodded, stepping back and bowing. He waited for everyone to walk in before moving to a set of controls, shutting the large doors before leading the way. They walked down the large hallway, finding another set of doors that could be opened manually. Itzel did so, and the sight ahead was a bit different.

Las Noches had two standard colors for clothing and rooming, and that was black and white. The exceptions of room color were given to the Espada and the three ex-shinigami, especially since they had more space. This room, despite having a white floor, was more decorated with rosewood bookshelves and tables lining most of the room, save for one wall. There was another door, slightly thinner than the first one the group entered through, but with a switch by the door. The seats were blue, and surrounded a small table. There was a pink rug underneath it, which stopped just an inch away from a desk.

A woman was sitting here. Her hair was bright orange, and was cut short. Her eyes were a serene blue and her skin fair. She was wearing a more appropriate arrancar uniform; a jacket, gloves, as well as pants and boots. She had an earphone on, and she was typing away at her computer. "I understand, Leyeur-chan. Reynaldo will be seeing you tomorrow at eleven; is that early enough." She spoke to the person at the other end of the line, gently. There was a pause, the woman still before she continued typing. "All right, then. See you tomorrow morning!" And with that, she bode the woman goodbye.

She looked up, just noticing the group before smiling. She removed the earphone, standing before bowing. "Lord Aizen, welcome." She greeted warmly before standing straight, turning to look at Arpeggio. "A new client for Reynaldo-sama, I see. That'll make his day." She said, cheerfully.

Arpeggio chuckled at the questioning looks that came from the many newcomers. "Let me guess; he's dealing with an ex-husband who's been denied a dispute file to stop his divorce."

"Ex-wife." She corrected, a small smirk on her face as she hit the switch near the door, a small light turning on above it. All the while, Itzel had let out a quiet groan, pinching the bridge of his nose in the process. The matchmakers had all cringed as well, moving to take a seat in the waiting area.

"An' who just might you be?" Gin asked, amused.

The woman bowed again, smiling. "Secretary to Reynaldo Fuentes, Nayla Marina. Pleasure to meet you."

Gin was about to comment, but a sound interrupted him. There were several clicks coming from behind the tall door next to the switch. It opened, and behind it came two people.

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_**Like? Please tell me how I'm doing, I want this story to be at its best.**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**Well, here we go.**_

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Arrangements

**Chapter Three**

The two people who stepped out were obviously conversing; more rather, the woman was talking while the man was walking alongside her, repressing the urge to let his annoyance be known. As she conversed with the male, everyone from the matchmaking department, as well as the secretary and security officer, had one hand placed to their ear; not one enjoying the scene more than the other.

"-there's just no way he could have said that; he would have told me!" She finally finished, trying desperately to get the man to listen. To the matchmakers, the woman was cut-and-dry; controlling, possessive, and used to getting her way, no matter the means.

The man, who the newcomers could only assume was Reynaldo, let out the annoyed sigh that was begging to come for what felt like hours. "I hate to inform you, but your ex-husband made it _very_ clear how he felt being with you. And even if he didn't, divorces aren't just filed based on what someone says. I go through your matchmaker, I have a proper counselor write up his opinions of you, and then I see whether or not you should stay together. In your husband's case, it was standard. You two are an unhealthy couple, so the divorce was filed. What's done is done."

Reynaldo was about to walk off until the woman grabbed his wrist. "We are fine, and you are going to file the dispute against this!" She nearly yelled, huffing out her breaths as she glared at the man.

He sighed once more; standing straight before standing before the woman. He placed his hands on her arms, gazing at her softly as a smirk formed on the woman's face. Then, without warning, Reynaldo tossed her towards Itzel, a neutral gaze coming about him. "Unfortunately for you, Madam, I am married to my work. Rules are rules, and where any other man in my position would fall pray to your tactics, I am immune to such advances."

The woman growled; trying to race at Reynaldo but held back by Itzel's strong grip. "Escort her out, Itzel-kun." The letter nodded, dragging the woman out before she could cause any damage.

Now that the nuisance was gone, the newcomers finally got a look at the man known as Reynaldo Fuentes. It was a day for wild colors, as Reynaldo was a man with long, messy teal hair, with deep turquoise eyes and welly tanned skin. His uniform wasn't an uncommon design. Bearing the standard white hakama, held up by a black sash, shoes of the same color on his feet, and gloves on his hands. His jacket was similar to Ulquiorra's, only the collar was higher, and he only zipped it to just beneath the sternum.

Arpeggio began walking towards him, smirking. "I knew I saw something between Itzel and Nayla, but...actually letting them get married? I thought you'd be concerned about them bringing their marital problems to the office."

Reynaldo snorted, placing his hands in his pockets. "They did that long before I let them get married, and they have the dignity to make sure the clients don't hear it. Besides, I'm a sap for true love, and I know it when I see it." He reminded Arpeggio, eying the file in his hand.

The blond looked down at the object in question, smirking still. "I know; that attitude and your professionalism are the main reasons I let you take the exam to get certified."

The counselor snorted. "So, who do we have for me, this time?" Arpeggio just handed over Ulquiorra's file. Reynaldo quickly glanced at the Cuatro, but then went about reading the evaluation form. "Sergi, you of all people should know by now that there's no such thing as unmatchable." Sergi grimaced at that.

Reynaldo flipped through the first few pages of the questionnaire packet before letting it close, shaking his head as he removed it from the folder. "Nayla-chan," the secretary stepped forward as he passed the packet to her, "Be a dear and toss this in the furnace, would you?" The woman took the packet, heading down the hall the others came before Reynaldo grabbed a new, much thicker packet than the one he disposed of. "Arpeggio, you remember that new evaluation form I sent out for efficiency-sake?"

Arpeggio stood firm, his face surprisingly strict. "_Hai_. The board is at a stalemate on whether or not to use it."

The blunette started walking past him as he stated: "Yes, well, if you wish to avoid cases like Ulquiorra-sama's in the future, I'd recommend putting it to work." He then turned to the Cuatro in question. "As for you, Ulquiorra-sama, follow me, please."

Ulquiorra's brow rose slightly, and he was about to step forward until his lord spoke. "There's no need to confide yourself, Reynaldo. You may evaluate him here while the others choose a probable match for their liking."

Reynaldo blinked now, twice. He then concealed his mouth with his hand, laughing into it within a second. "Lord Aizen," Arpeggio spoke up, before his lord could object, "Reynaldo is not called upon often, because his primary functions are for divorces and counseling sessions. Meaning that any and all sessions with him are in confidence, as he takes his clients not just for matchmaking purposes, but also counseling sessions. So, under those principles, the evaluation must be done in privacy or not at all."

Ulquiorra's brow rose. Privacy for a simple evaluation? "Then I shall accompany."

The teal-haired male shook his head, smirking still. "My process doesn't work with company, Lord Aizen. You want this evaluation as accurate as possible, and I would hope Ulquiorra-sama does as well. It's better that we go in, alone."

It was silent for a few moments, but soon Aizen sighed. "You'll be able to find a probable match before Monday?" Reynaldo nodded. Aizen paused, but he soon smirked again: "As you like, then."

Reynaldo bowed, thanking his lord before facing Ulquiorra. "Follow me, please."

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_**Still too short... ah, well. Hope you've enjoyed. :)**_

_**~ K. Fang-sama**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Well, this is the next chap. Should be fun. ;)**_

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Arrangements

**Chapter Four**

Ulquiorra entered Reynaldo's office, the latter following before shutting and locking the doors. The room itself was larger and much more lively than the one he came from. The walls were a nice tan color, with stained wooden floors. Lights were hung from the ceiling, and there were pieces of artwork to be found on the wall, which accommodated well with the room.

Reynaldo's desk was at the Western end of the room. It was mahogany, and it had a stained chair sitting behind it. There were a few assortments on the desk; a calendar, computer, and the like; but more interesting was what was above it. For on the Western wall was a old-fashioned, brass clock that was large enough to be read no matter how far you were from it. There were a few plants off to the corner, as well.

On the opposing wall were a few pieces of art, and at the far corner stood another plant. At the nearer corner stood a small kitchen station, with a stove, oven, mini-fridge, sink, small bit of counter space, and some cupboards. Ulquiorra assumed it was installed because Reynaldo was "married to his work," therefore, spent most of his time in the office. The stove was currently on, and was brewing water in a tea kettle.

Now, the wall opposing the door was much more interesting. As the center of the room occupied a few chairs and a couch, all in which circled a coffee table in front of a redwood fireplace. There was a nice rug underneath all the furniture, which were calming to Ulquiorra.

Reynaldo smiled. "Have a seat, Ulquiorra-sama. Wherever you're comfortable." Reynaldo told him as he went towards the tea kettle. It had just gone off by the time he reached it, all the while, Ulquiorra had taken a seat in a chair closest to the fireplace. It was lit, of course, and it helped him to relax. "Ulquiorra-sama," the ebony turned, "Tea?" The ebony paused for a moment, but he soon nodded. "Any preference?"

"Green tea." Reynaldo nodded, making the cups, placing them on a tray before bringing them over. He had set the tray down at the coffee table, taking the seat across from Ulquiorra before taking his cup.

The two sipped tea for a few minutes before Reynaldo placed his cup and saucer down, leaning back into the chair and crossing his legs before opening the file and taking out a pen. "Shall we get down to it?" Ulquiorra begrudgingly nodded, taking another to keep his distaste from showing. "Before I ask you a question on the actual packet, a few points I should make." The Cuatro nodded. "First of all," he began, "This setting, this privacy, my code of confidence, all of this is to secure the best of results. I want you to be honest no matter how embarrassing it may seem to you. By my code, I can't tell a single soul unless I get your full consent. I am not obligated to tell someone anything you wouldn't want them to know; including our superiors. Is that understood?" Again, another nod.

"Another note." Reynaldo began, allowing Ulquiorra to sit back before continuing. "You give me the air of a man who would much rather be anywhere else right now. Adding in Aizen-sama's interest and the demand of a strong wife, I take it that you are only doing this because you are ordered to." Ulquiorra stayed quiet at this. Reynaldo sighed, a small smile on his face. "I can't take away Lord Aizen's order, Ulquiorra-sama; I can only promise a wife you'll be happy with. But, remember this," Ulquiorra's head lifted slightly, "Aizen-sama may be able to force you to go through the matchmaking process, but he can't decide who or when you get married. That is a choice you get to make, and a right he can't take without breaking his own laws."

A hint of relief came about Ulquiorra, but he simply closed his eyes. "Arigatou."

The blunette smiled. "Dōitashimashite." There was another pause, Reynaldo taking a few more sips of his tea alongside Ulquiorra before placing his cup down again. "Now, onto an actual question." Green eyes opened, waiting patiently. "What characteristics do you find attractive in a woman?"

"Again with this pathetic question." Came Ulquiorra's annoyed response. "What is the point of asking such trivial things?"

Reynaldo's brow perked. No wonder Sergi had trouble with him. "The question is there, Ulquiorra-sama, because physical attraction; for men especially; is a large factor in choosing a potential spouse. All too naturally, men take in physical characteristics first hand, and each will have their own definition for what they find appealing about a woman."

Ulquiorra's eyes narrowed slightly. "I do not."

"Clearly." Reynaldo concurred. "So, allow me to try a different approach." Ulquiorra's eyes relaxed, and his brow rose. "As we find traits in our fellow beings appealing, there are also some that are unappealing. Can you name those?"

The ebony was about to pronounce the nonsense of that, but then he stopped to think. Actually, now that he thought about it- "...I suppose." He stated, feeling rather odd. He never talked about a female's physical traits before.

Reynaldo just sat back, pen ready and waiting patiently for Ulquiorra to gather his thoughts. As one might expect, Ulquiorra didn't form his opinions all too quickly. He carefully chose his words in order to describe them, and after several long minutes. "For starters," he began, making Reynaldo lift his head, "I do not like how most women in Las Noches choose to dress. It doesn't matter how _attractive_ they may seem to the other men, to me it's just..." He stopped there, unable to choose a word to describe his distaste.

The blunette smirked. "So, in saying that, you prefer someone more conservative." Ulquiorra nodded once, thankful Reynaldo understood. "Well that covers how they dress. Now, let's move on to body type." His Cuatro sat back into his chair, still looking a bit uncomfortable. "Now, obviously by Lord Aizen's request, this woman needs to be in shape." Ulquiorra nodded. "Well, in that extent, there are three different body types to choose from. Petite, fair, and robust, going from smallest to largest. I get the feeling a robust woman won't do for you from your previous comment, but what about petite women?"

The Cuatro paused, thinking over a few more moments before shaking his head. "Appearance alone makes me think of them as children. It doesn't help that most act like that."

Reynaldo nodded. "Fair it is, then." He wrote a bit in the packet, but then turned back to Ulquiorra. "Now, onto the final three in physical appearance: skin, hair, and eyes. Do certain tones or colors bother you?"

Ulquiorra's jaw clenched for a moment, but he shook his head. "Not truly. I barely notice skin tone, and no woman, save for Harribel-sama, has ever made eye contact with me. I do have a severe disliking for pink and blue, though."

The matchmaker nodded, wrote it down, and turned the page. "Alright, then. Onto personality traits." Ulquiorra put his cup down and waited for Reynaldo to continue. "This part of my evaluation packet is the longest, and for good reason. Both men and women find physical appearance attractive, but there are only certain personality traits and behaviors we actually like. As I go through this, I'm going to ask which of these traits you like and describe why, to state any that you find tolerable, and then to tell me which of them you absolutely despise. This will make results much more accurate. Can you manage that?"

Ulquiorra nodded, knowing of several things he'd rather not have to deal with

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Aizen glared at the entrance to Reynaldo's office, wondering what could be taking the pair so long. His other nine had already picked out a potential match to meet on Monday, which had taken over an hour. It was now pushing three hours, and the two made no sign of coming out soon. Some of his espada shared his impatience, but others were talking with their matchmakers about the girl they chose.

"You're sure?" Grimmjow questioned.

His matchmaker nodded. "Oh, yes, Grimmjow. Maria Averra holds a good strong front, but she's much more welcoming to change than most like her." The Sexta nodded. He was very particular about his taste, contrary to popular belief. Don't get him wrong, he hated this, but at the very least he was going to find someone he could enjoy being near.

"And how smart is she?"

"Maybe not as smart as you, Szayelapporro-sama, but definitely up your alley."

This continued for a few minutes longer. But after that, Aizen's mood became known. "Nayla-chan." He called.

"Hai, Aizen-sama?"

"What is taking Reynaldo so long to do a simple evaluation."

The secretary shook her head. "Most first sessions take a few hours. Reynaldo-sama wants his clients to be comfortable around him; he says it's better for both work progress and for the clients, themselves."

The lord was about to retort, until finally, the locks to the office door clicked, and they opened not long after that. Ulquiorra's expression, though fairly subdued, was still a bit of the nervous side while Reynaldo looked at him, smiling. "That's not a look you need to make. You did more than well, and the results will be more than enough to find someone suitable. I just wish I had time to show you some options before Monday." The ebony only nodded, returning to his colleagues silently.

"Reynaldo," Aizen called, "What should I expect in this match you're bringing forward?" He asked, expectantly.

The bluenette sighed. "I would love to tell you, but right now, I need to find the most probable match and bring her in on Monday. If I get the answer beforehand, Nayla will go inform you. Until then, milord, I can't honestly say." And with that, Reynaldo excused himself to begin searching for Ulquiorra's ideal match.

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_**HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I love awkward scenarios. Hope you guys did too. Until then, I'll see ya next time!**_

_**~ K. Fang-sama**_


End file.
